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Finally Some Alone Time

  • Posted on May 22, 2013 at 2:33 AM

On Saturday, as long as the plans hold, I’ll have a good couple hours, maybe more, alone for the first time in I don’t know how long.  I’ve needed this for a long time, since I haven’t been spanked since last September.  When I told G., he was very happy about it, so I’m assuming that he’s got some diabolical plans for me.  I bratted in two emails on Sunday (using the sticking out tongue emoticon), and I know I’m going to pay for that.  There’s also probably other things he wants to nail me for, even from a distance.  He hasn’t had a chance in a long time to make sure I pay for anything, at least since we saw each other last year, so I know he’ll come up with something.  Luckily I can’t use the Lexan paddle on myself, because it’s too big, or it would be even worse, but he’s good at coming up with evil plans without that.  With the new bamboo spoons, and the extra rubber rulers (yeah, I’m stupid, I bought two new ones because they were on clearance, plus I found the OLD one), and all the other implements I own, there’s enough to make sitting difficult (’bout damn time!).  Maybe I can even get him to make me a couple new audio clips.  The ones I have are old, and he doesn’t have to worry about anybody hearing him do them anymore.  He can even do them when we’re on the phone, so that his Toppiness will be right there, he won’t have to work from memory.  I have no problem being bratty enough to incite some good stuff!

One thing about finally being alone is that I’ll be able to use the loud implements for a change.  I’ve managed to sneak and use the Liquid Cane before when there’s been somebody home, but to be able to use the paddles and the hairbrush will make sure that it’s a memorable (and painful) session.  The belt will get some use too.  I wonder if he’ll say to use the belt more than usual because of so much brattiness?  It’s a possibility.  He doesn’t like bratting, and you know what happens when a Top doesn’t like something.  The implements get a good workout!  So on top of fantasizing about how things will go in September with the things I know I’ll be spanked for, now my mind is going over and over what he might come up with for Saturday!  I’m pretty sure I’m in a decent amount of trouble.  Hopefully we can skip corner time?  I HATE corner time!

Going to New York Again!

  • Posted on May 15, 2013 at 12:33 AM

I can’t get to Worldcon this year, but I came up with something as good, or better.  Going to New York to see G. in September.  So, here’s what I want to do when I’m there.

1. Get spanked
2. See the space shuttle
3. Get spanked
4. Go to the shooting range
5. Get spanked
6. See more of the city this time
7. Get spanked

Well, you get the idea.  Tourist-y type things.  And getting spanked.  A lot.  It’s a want AND a need.  Mostly a need.  And a want.  And a desire.  I want to feel the belt, the paddle, the riding crop, the belt again, the paddle again, the other paddle, the riding crop again, LOTS more of the belt, some of the hairbrush, and none of that freakin’ stupid evil indestructible plastic spoon from hell that G. LOVES because I hate it.  Between the two of us we have enough implements to make that one totally unnecessary!  Right?

More Punishment Thoughts, or Drunk Blogging!

  • Posted on May 5, 2013 at 2:01 AM

I’ve had enough to drink tonight to disconnect my brain from my inhibitions.  I’ll get out what I should write, instead of being concerned about what happens because of what I write.

I’ve been coming up with possible scenarios for the punishment that I know I’ll be getting from G. for skipping school (there doesn’t seem to be a statute of limitations LOL).  As usual, my fantasies go far beyond what G. would probably do, but he does tend to come up with some seriously evil ideas.  When I asked him why he hadn’t commented on my last punishment post, he said, “I don’t need to comment, I take notes.”  That could be dangerous, for my butt anyway!  Spilling my guts even further at this point will only add to that, but what fun is hiding options?  Might as well come out with some of them.

Not sure yet if I want it to be ageplay.  I know that if G. had been around back when it had first happened, I wouldn’t have been able to sit for a very long time.  The first time I was 14, but looked much older, so I wasn’t exactly a kid.  That means that any ageplay would be teen centered, especially for the later one, which was when I was 17.  It’s an option if nothing else.  Something to consider.

What I keep thinking about, because the first time was three different classes, that I’d probably get spanked with something different for each class.  Rubber ruler for the math class, paddle for gym, and maybe the hairbrush for English.  It’s not that I hated English (I hated Fundamentals of Algebra and gym!), I just couldn’t stand the teacher.  She was a royal pain, very domineering, and I didn’t do well with authority at that age.  I didn’t hate school in general, so I didn’t actually leave the building for those three hours.  I hid in the library.  Back then I tended to live in libraries, so it seemed like the best idea.  It’s probably why it took them so long to figure out that I’d managed to miss around a month’s worth of classes.  It’s been over thirty years, so I can’t remember the exact amount, but I seem to remember that it was a little over a month, something that couldn’t happen these days.  So, a spanking for each class, corner time in between, another spanking with a different implement for the number of days that I skipped, and then the belt for lying about it.  If G. had been around, I would’ve had to lie about having gone to all my classes to get away with it for that long, so I’m assuming that lying would be the biggest transgression.

There’s something else.  I never got punished for it when it happened, which is probably why I managed to skip a good chunk of 3rd year French.  I have a feeling that once G. finds out that I was never punished for it, (waves to G.), he’s going to want to add to the punishment to make up for the lack of punishment at the time.  I have no idea what he’ll come up with for that, but I can imagine that it won’t be good at all.  Again, he’s diabolical when it comes to that kind of thing, and I’m pretty sure he’s assumed, up until now, that I had been punished for it.  Once he reads this, he’ll know it all.  Even if I had mentioned about the skipping before, I’d never told him the whole thing, but now it’s out there, and I’m wondering if we’ll be discussing it at some point on the phone.  I want to, but I’m not sure if he does.  I hope he does.  We don’t do a lot of talking about it, though we’ve done more lately than we had in a long time.  I like that, and I’d like to do it even more.

Hot Punishment Thoughts

  • Posted on March 31, 2013 at 1:35 AM

The other night on the phone G. and I had a conversation that has led my thoughts to go to places they haven’t gone in a long time.  In a discussion about French numbers, I told him that although I had taken French for three years in high school, by the third year I knew I wasn’t capable of going anywhere with it because I’d never got the hang of it, so I’d started skipping classes that year.  He made that noise that lets me know that I’m more than likely in trouble.  I said that I didn’t remember how many times I had skipped, and I doubted that it was as often as I’d skipped the first three hours of school when I’d been a freshman.  That, of course, went over even less well than the first confession.  I tell that part of the story so that I can get to this part.  Now I can’t get the thought of being punished out of my head.  I’d been so stressed for the past six months that my brain couldn’t get to those feelings often enough to be of any real help, so now I realize how much I’ve missed feeling those things.  The slight fear of wondering what he’ll use to spank me, wondering what he’ll say, if he’ll institute corner time during the punishment, because we’ve been talking about corner time lately, for the first time in years.  It gives me a zing to think about all these things, even though I know that while it’s happening I’ll be anything but zingy.  Once I’m in the punishment mindset I’ll be done for emotionally.  He’ll spank me, I’m thinking multiple implements knowing him, and I’ll become a blubbering mess.  Then I’ll become malleable to an extent where I’ll agree to be a good girl for a very long time, if not forever.  It won’t last long, but while it does, I’ll become very submissive.  It happens every time.  It’s the only time I’m submissive.  I’m too strong willed and obstinate to be submissive the rest of the time, so G. has to work fast to get the promises out of me that he wants.

Until the time comes that he does punish me for this, and I have no idea when that will be, I’ll fantasize pretty much every possibility imaginable.  Except that there are always possibilities I don’t think of, because he’s diabolical when it comes to punishments.  He always manages to think up something so wrong and evil that there’s no way I could ever think of it ahead of time.  Maybe it’s the Top thing, but he always manages to surprise me somehow.  The fantasies I have about it are hot enough anyway, so they’ll do until it happens.  You’d think that fantasizing about it would lessen some of the impact of it, but being in the same room with G., especially when he’s intent on teaching me a lesson, makes it very serious when the time comes.  There’s that Top thing that comes over him, which very few people have seen.  He’s all business then, and very resolute on getting the results he wants.

I have months to fantasize until then, and I’m going to take full advantage of that.  Thinking about belts and paddles, and even the evil DUH (Depleted Uranium Hairbrush, which G. nicknamed), which is the heaviest hairbrush I’ve ever seen or felt, which we’d stopped using so long ago that I’d forgotten we even had it.  I’m sure he’ll want to use the Lexan paddle.  It’s big and very wrong, in my opinion!

I Need a Spanking

  • Posted on January 8, 2013 at 2:29 AM

For the past couple years, I’ve had very little, if any, time alone.  This has made my ability to get any spanking done impossible.  Until August of 2010 I had Saturday mornings for most of each year, except for winters, for hours long self spanking sessions.  I planned these sessions, looked forward to them, and was able to get much needed spankings done during those sessions.  Then in August of 2010 my sister lost the job that had her working on Saturday mornings, cutting off my alone time.  Since then I’ve had very few opportunities to have time to myself at home, let alone get any spanking in, because my sister almost never leaves the apartment.  When she does, Mom is home.  G. and I discussed this when he was here before Worldcon, and he discussed options with Mom for giving me time home alone.  She knows about the kink, but I’m not sure he mentioned it as the reason I need time alone.  I think he just told her that no time at all alone has been bad for me.  She agreed to making sure that once we were back from Worldcon that I would be able to get time alone.  Two weeks later she fell, breaking her right arm and leg, and ended up in the hospital for a week and a rehab facility for three weeks after that.  I spent most of that time with her, except when I had to work, and then at night.  ONCE in that whole month my sister happened to be out of the house when I was home, so I took the opportunity to get some spanking in.  It wasn’t hours long, I was lucky if it was an hour.  Mom has been home since the middle of October.  She was finally able to start driving sometime in November, and was able to leave the house on her own.  We’re back where we started.  When I’m home, the only time my sister leaves the house is late in the day, when Mom is home.  She doesn’t go out until very late in the day on the weekends, if at all.  So again I have no time alone.  If there was ever a time I needed a few hours alone to get some desperately needed spanking in it’s now, after all that time I was so keyed up when Mom needed me for everything.  It’s gotten so bad that I’ve developed a nervous tick where it feels like I can’t breathe deep enough.  I need time alone, but the last time G. managed to arrange it for me disaster struck.  There’s part of me that’s afraid to bring it up again because I don’t want it to cause anything else to happen.  It’s what G. calls “magical thinking”, and I don’t do it normally, but I feel like I can’t risk it right now.  I just need some time home alone, but my sister never leaves the house when Mom is out of the house.  Again.  The way it was for damn near two solid years.  I’m not sure how long my mental stability can hold out against this.  It’s winter, and Mom doesn’t leave the house as much as she does in the spring through the fall.  When it’s warm, she’s gone on Saturday mornings for hours.  It’s the wrong time of the year to even hope for hours to myself, but waiting until the spring doesn’t seem possible.  That won’t even help unless my sister leaves too.  Which she never does, because she stays up all night and sleeps until at least noon.  I’m hanging by a thread here, and that fucking thread is getting thin.  A good long session with as many implements as I can manage would do me so much good if it could go for two or three hours.  I want it.  I need it.

To hold you over until the long post

  • Posted on September 7, 2012 at 2:41 AM

G. and I spent 10 days together, the most we’ve ever spent together at one time.  I got VERY spanked, and my bottom still hurts in spots.  I’m going through a little bit of drop right now, so any post I write might get a little overemotional, so I’m going to put one together over the next few days or so.  G. brought the cane with him, so I got to have some fun, but he also used the belt a LOT, and the paddles.  I got punished for a couple things, mostly because it had been ten months since he’d spanked me the last time, in NY, and I tend to get a little attitudinal in the interim.  That’s mostly why I got the belt and the paddles so much.  I was VERY bruised, which I had thought didn’t happen anymore, so I was happy about that.  I love marks.  I can still feel the bad spots when I sit, which I like VERY much.  I have realized that my bed is too hard, because I can feel it even sitting on my bed.  Sitting at work was definitely interesting!  I have to decide where to post the pics I took.  I’m thinking FetLife, but I’m not positive yet.  Some of them seem a little brutal because I took them at different stages of bruising, and G. REALLY nailed the back of one of my legs where I got a huge purple bruise.

All those spankings have opened up my mind to new fantasies, so I may be writing some new stories based on those.  It’ll give me something to focus on until my brain is ready to write the big post about the trip!

Blast from the Past Party Report

  • Posted on August 7, 2012 at 12:57 AM

I decided to post this one because it was the one where G. came to town for the party.  A couple things.  One, this is part one of two, but Google isn’t giving up part two, so this may have to be it.  Two, you’ll notice the amazement which I express that our friend and her husband brought their LAPTOPS to the party with them.  You have to know, this was March 2001.  People weren’t in the habit of carrying those around all over the place the way they are now.  There were no smart phones either. LOL Wow, we’ve come so far in eleven years!
——————————————————-

G. got to town last Friday morning, and slept most of the day, because
being the vampire that he is, he had stayed up all night to get the
early plane. I called him at the hotel when he first got there, and
right away he started razzing me about the weather. LOL It had been 50
degrees two days before, but as soon as he showed up it was cold and
SNOWING. I think he brought it with him actually. (which I feel
completely safe in saying, now that he’s ALL the way back in NY again.)
————————–
You just THINK you are safe- G.
————————–
So we planned that I’d wake him up for dinner, which I did, and we did
dinner late, around 8, with my nephew. He’s 17, so it wasn’t like I was
carting a little kid around.

So after dinner, I dropped my nephew back off at my apartment (he was
over for the weekend), and G. said to call when I got there and he’d
come and pick me up. So I did that, and only SLIGHTLY goofed up the
directions to the apartment. I just told him that the driveway was on
the wrong side of the street. Luckily I realized it when I was waiting
for him, so I waited outside for him and waved him to the right side.
—————————–
Which was the left side, in actuality ;-) – G.
—————————–
After he finally saw my webtv setup, (I think he wonders how the hell I
manage now LOL), we went back to the hotel, and somehow I ended up
getting my first of FOUR punishment spankings. He decided that he was
going to see if the cane could be used for punishment, which I seriously
doubted, considering my love of the cane, but he was DETERMINED.
—————————–
I considered it a challenge to be met, an “experiment” to do – G.
—————————–
He put the chair in the middle of the room, told me to get up on the
chair, so I knelt on the seat, and he pushed me over the back of it,
rather forcefully. Then he pulled my pants and panties down, and
proceeded to give me a punishment caning I’ll never forget. It was hard
and fast, with no time between strokes to get used to the pain. I cried
harder than I ever have from any of his punishment spankings. Everybody
knows I don’t cry when I get caned! I was impressed that he was able to
do that.

Later on we ended up talking about things and I was kneeling at the foot
of the bed (I wasn’t about to sit after THAT caning! LOL), and we got
around to talking about bills and checking accounts, and he got his
ruler out. I got swats every time he didn’t like my answer. Good thing
it was over my pants! (Spankings are bare bottom, swats are over pants,
at least that’s MY take on it!)
———————————-
It is not a policy or anything like that, I was just being lazy- G.
———————————-
I ended up agreeing to be a good girl about the checking account and to stop
calling it the “Doofus Checking Account Plan”.
———————————-
Some people just can’t do anything the EASY way (of course, what fun
would that be for me if she did)- G.
———————————-
The next day we got up early (anything before 10 is early for a vampire
), and I got my SECOND punishment spanking, this time with the evil
weighted hairbrush, now nicknamed “The Depleted Uranium Hairbrush”.
———————————-
NB- They make armor piercing shells with depleted Uranium not because of
any nuclear energy reasons, but because it is extremely *hard* and very
dense, hence heavy. The reason for the nickname of the hairbrush should,
thus, be self-evident.- G.
———————————
GEEEEZ, that thing is LETHAL. OWOWOWOWOW!!! Needless to say, he had me
dissolved in tears again in short order. Good thing those don’t last
very long. That spanking was for giving notice at my last job before I
had something else lined up. He wasn’t going to punish me for it, until
he found out that it could happen again if the situation arose. Believe
me, it WON’T happen again. I don’t want to get spanked like that again!!
——————————–
Good to know I accomplished my objective (all while having fun, of
course)- G.
——————————–
After that, we waited for Ang (notabrat) and her husband to show up,
because they were coming to the party too. We spent the day with them,
talking computers. G. can no longer say that I’m addicted to email.
Ang brought her LAPTOP with her!!
——————————–
Actually, both she and her husband had laptops and they were, IIRC,
networked together :-) ) -G.
——————————–
I hadn’t checked my emails since the night before, and there she was
carrying her connection WITH her! So that proves I’m not addicted.
(I know that’s some kind of fallacy, but I’m damned if I can figure out
which one )
——————————–
It is an incomplete (implicit) syllogism. Jen needs emails less than
Ang, (Ang is not addicted to e-mails) => Jen is not addicted to e-mails.
Note that I put the incomplete part in parenthesis- there is not a hint
of an assertion that Ang is NOT addicted to e-mail, in fact, I would say
she is also quite addicted.- G.
——————————-
The party was good, as always, even if I did look like I’d already BEEN
to the party before we even got there! LOL I did get my very first ever
birthday spanking at the party. G. put me over his knee and spanked me
with the evil hairbrush, and I had to count the last five! I NEVER
count! I usually CAN’T count because I get lost in the spanking, trying
to stay on top of the pain. G. rubbed my bottom afterwards, and that
was great! I like birthday spankings.
———————————-
Even with the DUH? (Depleted Uranium Hairbrush, that is, I rather like
the acronym)- G.
———————————-
I didn’t get spanked at the party besides that one, but considering how
spanked I already was, it didn’t matter all that much. Eventually I WAS
in the mood for my usual caning though, so after Spank Court, G. and
I, with Ang going along to watch, went up to the room. I wondered what
it would be like to get caned by G., NOT as punishment. Getting caned
is a big thing for me, and getting to the zone is the ultimate goal, so
I got comfortable on the bed, and waited. G. canes really well, even
NOT for punishment. I relaxed into it, and by the end I knew we were
getting somewhere. I don’t know how many strokes I got (neither of us
ever counts these things), but when he was done, he ran the cane lightly
over my bottom and asked how I was. I mumbled something completely
unintelligible, LOL, and he knew I was blissed out. It was WONDERFUL.
————————————
Glad to help out :-) ) – G.
————————————
HE wasn’t tired of course, and with Ang there, he decided to get her
second spanking over with. He put her over his knee, and I stayed on the
bed, sloooowly coming down from my state of bliss. : ) I could see her
bottom was pretty well marked from the spanking he’d given her earlier,
and he proceeded to handspank her hard and well. I’d never seen him
spank anybody before, and it was amazing. I could see that power of his.
I was lying there, so relaxed that I could hardly move, and I watched
Ang get a spanking worthy of any painslut. At one point I asked
G. why he didn’t ever rub MY bottom during a spanking, and he
said,”Because you misbehave and disobey me.” HOT button time! Wow! I
know that most of my spankings are punishment ones from him.
———————————–
Not really because Jen is particularly “naughty”, but more because we
meet very infrequently (this is the second time), so there are lots of
opportunity to accumulate punishments on the “queue”- G.
———————————-
I was very impressed by how much Ang took. It was a hard enough spanking
to make G.’s hand balloon up! That’s as good as _I_ can take, and
everybody knows what a big ol’ painslut I am.
———————————
I was impressed too. A bit of advice to other Tops out there, if your
hand is getting played out from a hand spanking, be stoic about it- you
are NOT going to get any sympathy :-) ) – G.
———————————
I’m just noticing how long this post is getting, so I’m going to stop
here, and continue it in a second post. There’s still the rest of
Saturday night and Sunday to talk about! I promise, as soon as I get it
written and sent to G. for his comments, and get it back from him,
I’ll post it. You’ll know who to blame if it takes a while, and it won’t
be me, cuz I’m a GOOD girl.
——————————–
Oh, THAT’s nice, point the finger at me. I wouldn’t be too quick to
accuse *other* people of procrastination if I were you – G.

Five Days with a Vampire Part 2

  • Posted on August 5, 2012 at 6:35 PM

For some odd reason we woke up really early on Saturday morning, 7:30,
which gave me the normal three hours of sleep I’d been managing every
night during the trip. We talked for a while, got dressed, went to
breakfast, which was a first for G. (you know vampires don’t do
breakfast! ) and then went to panels ALL DAY. Started at 10 in the
morning, and the last one ended late, after 7! They were all extremely
interesting science panels, about everything from immortality to new
ways they’re trying to come up with to shoot off rockets and spaceships.
I learned a lot, and G. would occasionally add something here or there
to what the panelists were saying.

We did dinner with other friends of his this time, and did more party
wandering for hours and hours, (and played a really cool game “Apples to
Apples, which I want to get), and then we ended up in MY room this time.
He wanted immediate access to the paddles and the hairbrush! He had me
take off my pants and panties again, but this time had me bend ALL the
way over and touch the floor. I’m rather flexible, and can stand with my
palms flat on the floor. He spanked me with the hairbrush to
start, I think, scolding me while he spanked, and it HURT! I was trying
like crazy to stay in position, which I usually don’t have a problem
with. I know I was writhing around and making all kinds of noise, and
then he gave me two smacks at the end of it with the paddle. HARD! At
least I THINK it was the paddle. I was already crying hard and
apologizing by that time, so it’s difficult to tell.
————-
My recollection was that it I finished off using the hairbrush, which is
oh so effective.
————-
I couldn’t believe that it had happened again. I’ve been spanked
endlessly at parties, to the point where even Muffy thought I was crazy,
and had never had this reaction before, let alone this consistently!
Again he held me till I calmed down, and then after a while we went
to sleep.

Sunday G. slept in, though I didn’t, and we only went to two panels,
one about cryonics and then one about nanotechnology. Very interesting
stuff, and I already knew some of the stuff about nanotech before we
went to the convention (that’s what happens when you have three hour
phone calls with a physics major ), so I followed most of the panel
easily enough.

After dinner (again with friends), we went to the computer room so that
I could check my emails and G. could check something he was curious
about. I only checked my emails TWICE the whole time I was there, and if
you know me and emails, that’s like not checking them at all! at G.>
———–
Who is of the opinion that Jen is too absorbed by e-mail and chat.

———–
Then we did the party wandering again, for hours and hours, and G. got
caught up in this conversation at one party that was very technical,
about space travel. The no sleep bit was catching up to me at that
point, considering it was really late, so I might have zoned during a
little of it , but I
caught enough of it to know that he really knows his stuff! I was
impressed!
———–
I wandered into the middle of the conversation, from what I gather, this
guy who knew just enough about spacecraft to be dangerous was trying
(again and again) to come up with cost saving ways of building
satellites/spacecraft. The other folks, whom I took to be industry
professionals (WorldCon gets their share of engineers from JPL and the
like), were pointing up how these suggestions were like to make the
spacecraft more likely to fail and /or wouldn’t buy you much. Some of it
was just good engineering practice (the Keep It Simple Stupid principle)
other aspects required knowing a bit about the space environment. I’m
not a professional rocket scientist, supercomputers are the day job, but
I have read enough to hold my own (my handle, apoapsis, came from
orbital mechanics after all)
————
I should mention at this point that I had been bratting it up a TEENSY
bit all night.
————
Think 3-year-old up way past bedtime.
————
I don’t know what came over me, but I went for it! I KNEW what would
happen, but I still did it. I’d act all innocent of course, but for some
reason he wasn’t buying it. I thought I was pretty convincing! LOL So
when we got back to his room, I knew I was done for. He got his belt
out, and told me to take off my pants and panties, and to bend over the
way I had the night before. This was my first experience with his belt,
and he had me straining to stay in position again. The smacks across the
lowest part of my bottom were the hardest to take, especially since my
legs were spread, so the belt could get to places yet untouched! Then of
course he switched to the evil hairbrush from hell again, all the time
scolding me. He reduced me to tears yet again, a perfect record. While
he was holding me afterwards he did comment on the fact that I had taken
so much and had actually made it through the whole queue of punishment
spankings we’d had to save up. I THINK he was impressed………….
———-
Jen did real good.
———-
Monday morning came and we woke up relatively early I think. We talked,
this time about ourselves for a change, which we don’t do that much of.
Sometime during the conversation I said that since I’d had all my
punishment spankings, maybe I could have a fun spanking again, like on
the first day. I had mentioned that Mish had said that his handspankings
were something to panic about, LOL, so we decided that I would get a
handspanking. I should preface this by saying that I’ve been known to
wear out Tops who have handspanked me. Being such a painslut, it takes a
LOT to get me to squirm from a spanking that way. This was also a first.
He spanks very hard, and doesn’t ever wear out!! I kept expecting him to
say that his arm was getting tired or that his hand was hurting, but he
never gave out.
———-
Hey, this ain’t no wimpy Top here :-)
———-
That impressed me! He spanked hard enough and long enough for me to
actually get to the level I like.  I checked in the mirror afterwards, and
my bottom was a very nice color. : ) The bruises had almost all
disappeared by then, which may have been because I took my
vitamin C’s and E’s with me.

We got dressed after a while, (the first time I saw him in regular
clothes!) and went to have lunch. During lunch, he came up with the most
evil punishment plan for future misbehavior. His grin should’ve tipped
me off that this wouldn’t be good. It’s difficult to handle punishment
spankings from long distance, so he came up with the ultimate. No emails
for a day or a weekend, depending on the severity of the crime!!!!! I
said that was just MEAN to even think of, and instead of saying, “Well,
then don’t break the rules,” or something equally innocuous, he said,
“Then don’t be a bad girl,” thereby hitting half a dozen hot buttons!!!!
So now I HAVE to be a good girl, because I can’t do without my emails!
———
See, I told you- a total addict
———
Also, after I’ve been spanked I have to be a good girl anyway. Side
effect of being punished.  Since it was the last day, we got all packed
up, and then hit the dealer room because G. hadn’t managed to get
down there once the whole time!
———-
WorldCons are notable for having multiple things one wants to do at any
given time. In this case, what with my usual crowd, some folks I know
from another online forum, and Jen, my schedule was even more crowded
than usual.
———-
So we did that, and then met up with my friend who was driving me back
home. We got our stuff out of the rooms, and then after a minor snafu at
the checkout desk (where I just barely managed not to snap),
———–
The part I don’t understand is continuing to be upset AFTER the folks at
the front desk have found out what is wrong and made everything right.
———–
it was time to say goodbye. Just before he got in the taxi we hugged,
and that was really nice. I grinned and told him I’d email, AFTER I got
some sleep of course (yeah right!).
———–
My, aren’t we brave, after I am hundreds of miles away, that is.
———–
Then he got in the taxi and took off for the airport.

I had an incredible adventure for the first time in my life, and meeting
G. was the biggest part of that. If things work out, he’ll be coming
here for a spanking party in March. I want him to see me get caned!
————
sounds like something to look forward to.
————
So ends my five days (and mostly nights!) with a vampire.

Jen

Five Days with a Vampire Part 1

  • Posted on August 5, 2012 at 6:21 PM

First, to explain, this is a VERY old post, from back in the SSS days.  I just found it on Google, after thinking it was gone forever, because it was written two years before I had a computer.  Webtv had no way of saving anything.  It’s from September 2000, and it’s the account of the first time G. and I met face to face.  Like with my New York post, there is commentary from G. in it.  This is part one, because it needed so much detail.  The only thing I’ve changed is cutting his name down to G.  On SSS I used his whole first name.

———————————————-

Last week I went to Worldcon in Chicago. I was going to meet G. there,
and we’d been planning it most of this year, if not ALL of this year.
When I got there I checked to see if he was around, and I should’ve
figured he was still asleep. What can you expect from a vampire? So
I went downstairs to check out the dealer’s room and all the other stuff
they have, and just generally acclimating myself to being in a different
city for the first time in years, and being there by myself for at least
a little part of the time. I waited three whole hours to finally call
G. in his room, because I figured it wouldn’t be TOO early. He’d
always said that as long as it was afternoon I wouldn’t get in trouble
for waking him up!
————-
The plan was to get massive amounts of sleep in before the Convention,
’cause I certainly wouldn’t get any DURING the Con. That I mostly
accomplished the previous day.
————-
I think it helped to hear his voice on the phone first, before actually
seeing him. We spend hours and hours on the phone, and I’m used to that.
He said he’d be down to my room as soon as he’d gotten ready, and as
soon as I knew it was a certainty, the nerves hit. I couldn’t sit still,
my stomach was fluttering, and I was panicked that he wouldn’t like what
he saw. I ran around like a crazy person getting myself into something
resembling semi-perfect.

When I heard the knock on the door I had to keep from running over and
flinging it open. I looked through the little peephole and there he was,
in full costume already. I opened the door, and the last physical
barrier was gone. I was still so nervous as he came in and we started
talking. He sat on the edge of the bed, and so did I. It didn’t take
long before the nerves were completely gone and I was completely
comfortable with the fact that the reality had finally replaced the
cyber.

We talked about things in general, most of which escape me now.
Eventually I dragged out my baseball bag with all my toys, and he of
course wanted to try them out. I’ve learned something. Don’t spank a
painslut over jeans! LOL My butt’s hard enough as it is, and jeans make
it damn near impossible to save certain kinds of toys from destruction.
As hard as G. spanks, it’s a good thing I have so many indestructible
toys. Wow! I think he knows me well enough to know that I like it hard.
I am genetically a painslut, I think.
————
HER toys are indestructible, luckily. About half of MY toys gave up the
ghost when being used :-)
————
After all the toys had been used, I looked in the mirror at his
handiwork. I was so bruised I wondered how I was going to handle the
next five days! I knew I hadn’t been spanked in six months, but hadn’t
figured that it would take me all the way back to the early days when I
got marked so easily.

We talked some more, and then went down to the convention. Being the
first day, it wasn’t very crowded, so it was easy to get around. We went
out with his friends for dinner, and then went party wandering, which
lasted till about 1:30 in the morning. Then we ended up back in his
room, talking for hours and hours. At some point, and maybe he can
remember WHY, he wanted me to figure out a math problem. Well, he KNOWS
that math and I don’t get along, and for some reason it brings out the
brat in me. I protested, and then he said to stand up, which wasn’t a
good sign. I said I’d do the math, and he said, “Yes you will, after you
get spanked.” ACK! A real live punishment spanking for something I’d
just done! He told me to take OFF my jeans and panties, and to bend over
the bed. I did, and he spanked me really hard. I think it was with the
hairbrush, considering he likes it way too much. Something odd
happened during that spanking. I really started regretting being a brat
and goading him into spanking me (I admitted doing that when he asked),
and I started crying. He kept spanking me until I was crying full-force,
and when he knew that I really was sorry for doing it, he stopped. I was
shocked that it had actually happened, because anybody who knows this
part of me knows that I don’t cry while being spanked! He held me while
I cried, and until I calmed down, which was VERY nice, and then we ended
up talking again (after I’d figured out the math problem : )) until
about 8 in the morning.

Other details will be left to the imagination, because I don’t know if
I’m the type to “kiss and tell”.

Jump to the next night, after going to science panels (I actually
learned things!) and dinner and more parties, this time with a recently
partly converted friend of mine, and her friend. She’s more into the
power exchange but she has been spanked, and her friend wanted to buy my
Loopy! So we all went party wandering for hours,
———–
Despite your friend’s sister doing a number on her knee while going down
the stairs
———–
and then they went to my room for the night and we went to G.’s room.
I got spanked again, but noticed something strange about my bottom. The
bruises were going away instead of multiplying! Anyway, that night G.
had me bending over the bed again, and pinned my legs with one of his,
and spanked me HARD. The same thing happened, I cried DURING the
spanking. Two nights in a row! He held me again afterwards (I think
that’s one of the best things about this, not counting the actual
spanking!) and we ended up going to bed at 4:30, like normal people.

I think I’m going to stop here and make this a two-parter, because I
don’t want to leave anything out!
To be continued………………

20 years ago today

  • Posted on August 3, 2012 at 2:33 AM

Yesterday I realized that today would have been my 20th wedding anniversary.  It made me very happy that it wasn’t.  I couldn’t imagine still being married to my ex.  My life would be hell if we’d stayed together.  I married him at an age where I thought that if I asked nicely, he would oblige my kink.  Well, that didn’t work, because he didn’t understand it.  Not only was he vanilla, he didn’t even have an imagination.  The only reason we didn’t do it in the missionary position was because he had bad knees, so we had to do it with me on top.  EVERY TIME.  No variation.  It was okay at first, but after a while it got old.  Until it got to be rare.  After the first few years we had sex once a month.  Then it happened even less.  By the time he left we hadn’t had sex in almost six months.  Later on I found out that he had been planning on leaving for about nine months, so it made sense then.  I hadn’t been happy anyway.  The couple times I had talked him into Topping me, he had no idea what to do, and constantly Topping from the Bottom took all the joy out of it for me.  It turned out that, even though he was vanilla, he was THE most submissive man I’d ever met.  He couldn’t stand up for himself, even with me, and I needed him to at times.  I needed him to take charge when I couldn’t do it myself.  He was incapable of it, and I became bossier as time when on.  I only did it out of complete frustration at having married a man who refused to have a backbone about ANYTHING.  He only knew how to be passive aggressive instead.  I didn’t have access to the internet back then.  Hell, it took a couple years before I even knew about the internet, and then I didn’t know that there were people on it who wanted to be spanked like me.  So for five and a half years I was stuck in a marriage where my needs couldn’t be met, and the only way I could get off during sex was to fantasize about spanking in my head.  When he left, on April Fool’s Day no less, I was upset only at the thought that I wouldn’t be married anymore.  I liked the being married part, because I liked having the status it seemed to give me.  I had no problem sleeping by myself, and five days later, I got over it.  When he left, there was no note, no message on the machine, nothing.  I had no idea what exactly had gone wrong for HIM.  I still don’t.  On the fifth day I was finally able to get his uncle on the phone, who told me that no matter what I did, he wasn’t coming back.  I made the decision in that moment that I wasn’t going to fight to keep him, since he obviously didn’t want to be with me.  I haven’t seen or talked to him since the morning of April 1st, 1998.  He was even too much of a coward to let me be in court for the divorce.

Six months later, my great aunt gave me her Webtv box.  I couldn’t afford a computer back then, and this gave me the access to the internet.  By then I knew that there were spanking sites on the internet, so I went to those, but it was the day I went searching for newsgroups that my life changed forever.  I found soc.sexuality.spanking, and there were all these people on there, talking about spanking like it was the most normal thing in the world, and also about every day things that proved to me that they were like everybody else.  I had always thought I was sick and twisted for wanting to be spanked, and my ex’s opinion of the whole thing hadn’t helped change that.  For the first time in my life I felt like I was home.  I was connected to people who finally understood me.  I lurked for all of about a week, and then I couldn’t take it, I started commenting on posts.  I officially delurked on October 30, 1998, and became a real part of the group.

I had been repressed sexually my whole life, mostly because of my need to be spanked.  I had thought it was an impossible need, something I’d only be able to fantasize about for my whole life.  Finding the group showed me that I could have what I wanted and needed.  It freed me.  At my first party, less than a year later, I felt like I was born to do what we do.  I wanted to experience it all, and I did my best.  I was a kid in a candy store.  A wonderfully amazing kinky candy store, and I loved it.  I was finally able to be the person I was meant to be.  It was the start of my new life, the beginning of what’s been an amazing adventure.

Twenty years ago today I got married, thinking that was going to be the rest of my life.  The best thing my ex ever did was to leave when he did.  I was in my mid 30′s, just coming into my own, with the opportunity to find out who I was for the first time.  I explored everything, finding out what I liked, what I didn’t like, what I wanted, what I needed, and what was essential to my being when it came to kink.  The only thing that bothers me now is that I can’t be open about who I really am with most people.  Some day I hope that changes too.